Well I'm back, and not quite in the swing of things. After the incredible rush of this trip, I'm finding it difficult to return back to life as I knew it. This trip stirred something inside me and has me pondering some important questions. Am I truly happy? What would I rather be doing? How can I find the happiness I felt the last two weeks every day?
I definitely feel some kind of void in my life. What it is, I can't quite pinpoint, but something is off. I guess you can say I'm not exactly fulfilled by sitting at a desk all day. But could I deal with that if some other part of my life was more complete? I know I work too much. Between my real job, soap, and the occasional side job, I spend too much time working and not enough with my friends doing things I enjoy. That has to change. I also need to travel more. I have a whole new network of friends, and I'm going to make a point of seeing them again. Vacation doesn't have to be a week, it can be a long weekend. If I were to change my job, what would I want to do? As much fun as I had traveling, I did get homesick by the end. There goes my glamorous career as a travel writer. Maybe some kind of outdoor job or something where I get to create. The thing I hate about meetings and discussions is that at the end of the day, there's nothing tangible for me to look at and say I did. That brings me no joy. Do I want to move? At nearly 5 years in my current house, it's the longest I've lived somewhere since college. I do like this town, but is there somewhere better? Is it time to leave Connecticut, as I always swore I'd do? And yet, there's nowhere I've been that's made me say "I could live here". And I doubt there's anywhere that can keep my stomach as happy. In the two days I've been home, I've gorged on every one of my favorite Italian treats that I missed the last two weeks.
Before I left, I knew this would be the trip of a lifetime, but I never expected it to make me question where my life was going. It will be interesting to see how this plays out. In the mean time, I know that I miss my friends terribly.